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The ancillary benefits of torture |
by Brig. Gen. Gus ‘Sparky' Bloodworth,
as told to Don Nash, Unknown News
March 1, 2005
There is nothing like the smell of burning enemy combatants in the morning. An electrode or two placed discreetly on sensitive areas of the human body hardly even leaves a mark. Add some electrical stimulation and an enemy combatant suddenly has a remarkable sense of rhythm. Even the most ardent of Islamists will sing like a Robin in the springtime. Depending on the amperage that is established at the outset of a session, you can almost reproduce the smells of a summer barbecue.
You can eliminate the screaming through the use of a little duct tape. We got that idea from Tommy Ridge. The plastic sheeting comes in handy in the event of the application of too much electricity. It does happen from time to time.
It's absolutely hilarious to watch grown hard-core fundamentalist terrorists wet themselves when they are confronted by a trained attack dog. These guys think they are so tough -- well, let me tell you, they'll cry and whimper like little school girls when faced by a dog on a short leash. There is a thrilling, almost heavenly euphoria that is induced by holding an enemy combatant's feet to the teeth of a snarling dog.
Thank the good Lord that Iraq is a lawless haven for cowboys, soldiers, and the dogs of war. If this were any other even halfway civilized country, we'd never get away with the stuff that we can get away with here. It's a good thing that George Bush doesn't read the ‘intelligence' that we can produce here. He'd never understand it in the first place, and in the second place, it's all made up anyway.
We can get an enemy combatant to say anything that we want him or her to say. We almost had Haji ready to admit to swallowing those weapons of mass destruction and therefore the Iraq Survey Group couldn't find them. If I'd of had ten more minutes with our pal Haji ... it's just too bad. Our dogs ate very well that day.
For certain, we have learned the breaking point of your typical enemy combatant who is also an Islamist and a fundamentalist terrorist. Discovering their breaking point was the single most important ancillary benefit to our use of torture. That and the numerous vagaries that we were able to get them to admit to. Believe me, they'll admit to anything by the time we are finished with them.
I understand that there are the bleeding hearts across America who whine and moan about "cruelty" and "inhumane treatment" of those that are undeserving of humane treatment. We only torture enemy combatants and people we're pretty sure or suspect or look like enemy combatants. And on occasion, we do torture their wives and children, but that is ancillary.
We've been able to acquisition an excellent medical team that can undo the harm and marks that are sometimes left on the enemy combatants. That is unfortunate but we have overcome the obstacles to the obvious.
In conclusion allow me to add, God bless George Bush. God bless America and to the victors go the spoils.
Most sincerely yours,
Brig. Gen. Gus ‘Sparky' Bloodworth
Psy-Ops Command, U.S. Army
. Guantanamo Bay, Cuba
. Abu Ghraib Prison, Iraq
. And at least 24 secret
U.S. prisons in secret
locations, worldwide
© by the author.
What do you think?
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We can get an enemy combatant to say anything that we want him or her to say.
We almost had Haji ready to admit to swallowing those weapons of mass destruction and therefore the Iraq Survey Group couldn't find them.
If I'd of had ten more minutes with our pal Haji ... it's just too bad.
Our dogs ate very well that day.
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